Frances The Mute

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If the Pink Floyd / Storm artwork doesn't give the game away (and yes it is Storm artwork), then the songs being listed in 5 'parts' and the fact that this is a concept album based on a found diary should erase any doubt whatsoever - if the words PROG ROCK put the fear of Rush into you then turn away now, for The Mars Volta have come to take your 4/4 time signature-loving little soul! To be brutally honest, this is like everything I hate most in music (poodle rock angry bee guitar solos, funk slap bass, Robert Plant-style screeching...) thrown together in a blender and then re-cut into the most discordant rock opera I've come across. Have I led a sheltered life? If anything could out-Bohemian Rhapsody the great pomposity of Queen then this surely could. A slowed down version of Santana's "Smooth" rubs shoulders with some awful Scorpions-styled power ballad and something that Autechre would be proud of (sonic fluff in reality) and all sandwiched in amongst YET ANOTHER dose of guitar noodling. That's 5 minutes described... just wait until you hear the other 70! I would never condone the use of the devil's weed, but I'm guessing that there's one sure way that this would all make perfect sense...know what I mean???